Rock Candy Reviews

We all occasionally get on our high horses, and say broad statements about the world.

• “People have lost their way.”
• “It’s all their fault.”
• “Anyone who thinks that, is a terrible person.”

In some conversations, it is inevitable, but have we become too accustomed to making quick judgments based on those intense sentiments?

Morals are obvious one moment, and a hazy shade of grey the next. Everyone loves to talk a big game about right and wrong. Yet, we remove ourselves from any responsibility when we talk about hypotheticals or other people’s drama.

It may be easy to say “that would never happen to me”, but what if a person in your personal circle, someone you’d never expect, says or does something that goes against your deepest morals?

Would you toss all the years of care and trust away, and leave the person behind forever? Or would you want them to atone for their sins, and hope that others will forgive them like you are trying to?

If you answered right away, you have demonstrated the problem perfectly. You can’t predict your reaction to these events. No one can, and saying you know for sure what you’d do is putting yourself in a box.

For your own sake, don’t lock yourself in to a decision before anything has actually happened. People will hold you to your word, and if you end up going against it, some won’t care about your reasoning as to why.

They might rebuttal with “But you said you’d react a different way than how you actually ended up reacting. You’re such a hypocrite!”

When people do bad things, it’s so easy to react quickly with black and white thinking. People have rushed to social media to condemn someone to death, without putting themselves in the shoes of others.

What if it was your family member who turned out to be the culprit? What if it was your lover? Your best friend? Would you be the hero you think you are, and turn them in? Or would you do everything in your power to change their fate? To protect them?

Seemingly innocent people can do bad things, too. Yet, we still pretend that our inner circles are somehow immune from making mistakes or wronging someone else. Before making broad statements, maybe we all should take a moment to ask ourselves if “deserved” and “needed” are the same thing.

The things we think someone might be deserving of, might not be what is needed for the best overall outcome. We want the best for the people we love, but we can be overly cruel to those we have no connection to. This is why broad statements are so dangerous. We start to excuse the worst actions of those we are close to, and punish anyone we see as “others” more severely.

Unsurprisingly, I see this kind of perilous thinking in spaces that are prone to mob mentality, and doxxing. As a person who has been into many different fandoms, the experiences of witnessing real life consequences are too many to count. People’s lives can be forever changed, just because someone decides they are the judge and jury of every drama and conflict. Everyone has the right to they’re own takes and opinions, but we have to realize not everything is our choice to make. We can only control ourselves and our actions.

On the fictional side of things, we also need to stop treating fictional characters as the end all be all of morality. Stories are made to make the viewers think and feel, but they are also in the control of the writers of said stories. They are the ones who ultimately choose the characters’ thoughts and actions, and we simply react to them. While they may be based off of real life experiences, they shouldn’t be used as the only way to judge people in reality.

I am a firm believer that people can change for the better, but I also understand that each individual needs to make their own choices on who they interact with. My thoughts are not meant to say any specific scenario is right or wrong. They are to encourage people to give more thought to how they talk and think about others. We are all humans, and we are all capable of good and bad things.