Rock Candy Reviews

Sometimes, I wonder why I get betrayed so much. No matter if it is friends, family, or even strangers.

What I mean by betrayal is me expecting good or at least decent treatment, just for people to go out of their way to tell me I don’t deserve it.

People will tell me I’m selfish for wanting to be respected. Then, they will get even more upset if I treat them with anything less than the utmost respect.

I’ll say “hello” to someone, and they’ll respond with silence. I’ll ask someone to help me, and they’ll debate me on whether I can or can’t do it by myself. I’ll say my genuine thoughts when asked, and people will talk over me.

It almost has become easier for me to expect others to give me a hard time for doing as everyone else does. Genuine kindness from others is so foreign to me, that it kind of makes me uncomfortable during the few times that it happens.

I know there will always be people who are rude and unfriendly. However, I won’t deny how exhausting it is to go through life not trusting anyone to treat you decently.

Part of getting better will hopefully involve me finding people who won’t make me feel bad for wanting kindness from them. It’s been too long since I felt like I was around people who would want me to be happy and cared for.